I haven't posted in almost 2 years. Its strange coming back to this place but I have decided that I should try to blogging again, maybe I will re-read these posts many many years from now. Reading my old post is hilarious, I feel like I came along away since I was just 15! Its also amazing to see what I have wrote during my diffcult years of being a teenager in a boarding school, alone and pretending to be strong.

and now, I am starting 2nd year of Nursing. Its strange since I thought I was going to become a biologist but in the end I chose nursing because pharmacy was too hard (but secretly, I didn't want to do it, the job seem awfully unrewarding emotionally). I guess I didn't choose to study biology because I wanted to have something that guaranteed a good job, it is so human nature. lol But it is alright, I think being a nurse won't be too bad, if I don't like it, I will figure it out for myself. I am excitied and nervous for the new semester to begin. I hope I can get along with my new classmates and the year goes by smoothly.

I feel like my pespectives have changed so much. I am so grown yet so childish in many ways. I have, some strange ability to stay happy in complete isolation and live relatively unstressed. Maybe its because I am an only child but out here in Winnipeg, by myself, without family to help me and not exactly many friends to hang out with, I am completely content with myself. I am not trying to brag but I feel like there is strange independence to me, like a little girl who plays with herself in a sandbox, I am happy to just be. I enjoy shopping, cooking and just day to day living. I don't crave drama, attention or companionship, I enjoy peace, quite and doing whatever I want! Such a difference from the 15 year old me that was dying to fit in.

So much has happened since than. My parents have both remarried, much to my relief. I did NOT want to be stuck having either of them trailing me for life. My father has also fathered other child, a little boy I have named Oscar. People tell me I am suppose to dislike this baby, but honestly, its a baby and I am too much off a grown ass woman to hate a child. My father has been kinder to me now but secretly, there is a part of me that will never forgive him for the hurt he created throughout my childhood. I wish him the best but I honestly cannot picture myself being very close to him.

My mother has married a nice man name Bo, he is very religious, a creationist and lives by the bible. Though it has been somewhat unsuccessful IMO, considering he remarried 3 times, now to my mom. Mom also converted to christianty; she regularly tries to convert me but chrisitianity is just not for me. The ideas they want me to believe requires me to reject all knowledge I have learned since highschool. From the outside looking in, christianity and religion has always appeared to be a club to me rather than sprituality. I have developed a sense of sprituality on my own, god is a kind being and probably regularly cheers me on in life, the end.

Kelly is probably going to move in with me starting september which I think will nice. She has been one of the most consistent people in my life! So chill and relaxed, nice to have around. That's it for now, I have a stat exam next friday. Such joy.